Archive for the ‘copywriting’ Category

Not many people would consider Paris Hilton to be an Eco-Warrior but it seems that’s exactly what she is! Of course she has a public image to maintain so she couches her advice in some typically obscure metaphors but it’s all there, you just have to listen to her.

Paris Tells Her Friends About Coastal Erosion

Paris Tells Her Friends About Coastal Erosion

Paris has more then 3 million twitter followers so if just a few percent of them could pick up what she’s putting down and tell their friends that “it’s what Paris would do” then that message would really start to get about.

Paris says: “The only rule is don’t be boring and dress cute wherever you go. Life is too short to blend in.”

What Paris means is: It’s important not to become monotonous on a particular issue. If you make your arguments succinct and entertaining and high in easy, practical advice then people will listen to you. Don’t become just another eco-bore.

Paris Says: “No matter what a woman looks like, if she’s confident, she’s sexy.”

What Paris means is: Know your subject matter and know your enemy.

Paris says: “Wal-mart… do they like make walls there?”

What Paris means is: Huge multinational conglomerations are destroying the environment with their need for cheap materials, they walk all over their employee human and workers rights, from sweatshops making their pricey running shoes in developing countries to the minimum wage, no sick pay or medical coverage that they force upon their domestic workers companies like Wal-mart build barriers to social cohesion and economic development for thousands while making their stock holders rich.

Paris says: “I don’t really think, I just walk.”

What Paris with her pimped humvee means is: Once you’ve become dedicated to environmental change it’s not something you have to think about, it’s just something you can get on with. And don’t drive a car, walk.

Paris says: “Who are you wearing?”

What Paris means is: Wearing clothing that isn’t ecologically sound or made of fur etc. makes you a nobody. Think about what you put on your body as well as what you put in it.

Paris says: “I’d imagine my wedding as a fairy tale… huge, beautiful and white.”

What Paris means is: A wedding is the happiest day in a girls’ life. The happiest day in Paris’ life will be when there is no longer any danger to the polar icecaps. They will indeed be ‘huge, beautiful and white’ we need to cut greenhouse emissions and do more to protect the environment.

Paris says: “This is Earth. Isn’t it hot?”

What Paris means is: We have to do something about global warming immediately. From remembering to turn off electrical items properly to trading in our cars for bikes and committing to only buying locally produced goods.

Paris says: “Trust me, people act differently toward you when you’ve got jewellery on your head.”

What Paris means is: It’s not just the tree hugging, hippy dippy crystal gripping beardy weirdies who have influence over issues like coastal erosion and global warming. Even people who dress in suits and ties that go to work in everyday jobs have a personal responsibility to do what they can to protect the environment. In fact the more professional you look the more import people will give you.

Paris says: “I don’t want to be known as the granddaughter of the Hiltons. I want to be known as Paris.”

What Paris means is: Just because things have been done the same way for generations that doesn’t mean that it’s the right way to do things, we need to innovate to create. Innovation is the greatest gift the human race has been blessed with and if we change the way we do things we really can save the planet.

Not many people knew that Paris was so environmentally conscious but it appears that she really is committed to improving the environment. So, like, eugh, whatever!

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Facebook, in what could be another potential degradation of its users privacy launched a new enhancement last week whereby those users who Facebook on their iPhone will be able to use their phone to broadcast their location to their friends.

Facebook Places works using GPS equipped iPhones, it works out your location and presents you with a list of local landmarks and attractions where you can ‘check in’ and this information is then used as an update letting your friends know where they can find you. If you ‘breadcrumb’ particular restaurants, bars or clubs your friends will know where you have been and what you thought of the place while you were there.

Of course location based mobile apps like Foursquare already exist and are growing in popularity they are virtually insignificant when you consider that Facebook’s subscribers number more than the entire population of the United States. According to Facebook’s own figures, 150,000,000 use their phone to access it. However, Places is only currently available as an iPhone app through an enhanced mobile website. Facebook will be hoping that businesses and industry will see the advantages of being able to market to people knowing their specific location and pay to advertise thus creating a new revenue stream with deals for local business, sponsorship and special offers.

The security issues are obvious and Facebook says that Places has built in controls to protect sensitive location information such as limiting the default visibility of check ins to friends only however, as iPhones proliferate and become cheaper users will become younger, anxious parents might give their child a phone enabled with Places so they can check their whereabouts at all times, but children are notoriously careless with their online security leaving them open to hacking and thus broadcasting their entire Facebook profile and location to the world.

Facebook has made various  changes in privacy controls in numerous regions following privacy issues and some critics are claiming that Facebook runs a “Here Now, Security Later” policy to new features.  Augie Ray, social networking analyst with Forrester Research said in an interview with The Wall Street Journal that: “It’s nearly impossible to launch any new social feature without some level of privacy concern, and it remains to be seen whether users will like or dislike the fact that they can be checked in by their friends,”

Facebook countered that since not all of its users had the phones required to access the service it’s merely an advantage to the iPhone and users can turn the friends check-in off entirely, although it is permitted by default and, as lifehacker point out, it is often found that facebook applications far harder to turn off than seems altogether reasonable.

The New Brew

Posted: August 27, 2010 in copywriting

When I was a nipper my dad used to have strange white globes in the garage and airing cupboards. Murky liquids with sickly sweet smells would occasionally bubble up through twisted glass valves, elsewhere in the house corked bottles were piled up and would sometimes pop disgorging rancid fruit and vegetable experiments all over the floor and making the whole house hum.

Welcome to the exciting world of home-brew 1970’s style!

My father thought himself to be something akin to the living embodiment of The Good Life. He was Tom to my mother’s Barbara, I’m not sure where my brother and I fitted in but I digress; we lived in a house where things were repaired, reused or convoluted functions were found for any odd or end rather than throw it away. We grew vegetables and even kept a few goats. The smell of goat still brings a shiver to my soul even now.

As well as growing things my dad loved to make his own beer. To me he seemed like an alchemist in wellington boots while he laboured over malted barley and hops or experiments with using bars of chocolate as a sweetener. It doesn’t work, don’t try it.

Well, I was thinking back to that time when the price of beer went up yet again recently and seems set to rise yet again very soon. Perhaps my old man had the right idea, make enormous quantities of your own ale and beat the tax-man! I didn’t remember it looking like a particularly difficult process, so long as you had the time to monitor temperatures, watched out for dangerous pressures, running the risk of the whole thing turning to vingar for no known reason, didn’t mind airing cupboards being over-run with fermenting demijohns and the occasional explosion in the middle of the night.

Well, I was starting to go off the idea again when I found what I think is the twenty-first century’s answer to all that fuss, labour and cleaning opportunities. The Beer Machine Brew Master, I have to say, has been the answer to this dream of mine. No more sterilizing vats or trying to track down hops and malted barley, you just need to get the equipment set up, add the 100% natural beer mixture and in just over a week or so you get 17 pints of beer you made yourself.

The Brew Master comes with a bottling transfer system that lets you siphon off the beer into bottles, a de-foamer system and its own carbonation unit along with 3 carbon dioxide chargers. It also boasts pressure relief valve, spare taps, temperature and pressure valves and, perhaps most importantly, brewing instructions!

So Kate Moss says “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” and once again we’re treated to tabloid OUTRAGE as super skinny models make young girls anorexic. Except Kate isn’t that thin any more & the problem of obesity is far more common and threatening more lives in the west than a few  girls taking skipping lunch to its illogical conclusion.

It’s easy to blame slender models for the apparent increase in childhood anorexia and eating disorders as well as body dysmorphia but that’s simply shooting at the most obvious target until you actually look a little deeper.

Designers use extremely thin models for their haute couture ranges and runway shows it’s true but what girls are interested in high end fashion when their pocket money will barely stretch to buying more than a few bits from Primark, let alone titles such as Vogue or Harpers?

It’s still more or less acceptable in many areas to point and laugh at fatties trundling down the street and the very fat are something of a curiosity, they draw our attention whether we like to admit it or not. Our governments try to tell us to eat healthily and everyone knows that to have a slender body is to have a healthy body but the message is not getting across. In a recent survey in Scotland it was revealed that some parents thought that a can of Coke or a bag of chips counted toward their ‘five a day’- a programme set up by central government to get people eating at least 5 pieces of fruit or vegetables every day.

While the powers that be are trying to convince us that obesity is becoming an epidemic and yet information is so thin on the ground is it any surprise that children are confusing the message and becoming dangerously thin while there’s a constant soundtrack murmuring ‘Britain’s getting fatter, loose more weight’?

Much as we need to stop blaming the overweight for their own failings when it comes to moderate portion sizes we should also stop blaming the thin for promoting the idea of thinness as ideal. By the very nature of their title models have bodies that others strive toward. Models shouldn’t be the spokespeople for any agenda, they’re there to look pretty. If you’ve ever been caught in conversation with a model you’ll know it’s almost, but not quite as soul destroying as time spent with an actor or musician, the more successful they are the more vapid, insular, self delusional and short sighted -in terms of world view- they become, hardly a great ambassador for any cause and certainly not for something as important as the younger generation’s long term health.

As we enter the second decade of the twenty first millennia the first of the international fashion weeks is scheduled to start in mid February. London will be the venue for the first new designs of The Tens, showing us the direction fashion, couture and style will be headed in the future. 120 miles away at the University of Bristol information is being discovered about the interesting history of style and culture.

Archaeology professor João Zilhão at Bristol University has discovered evidence that the use of cosmetics goes back not only to our early human ancestors  but even to our pre-human antecedents, the   Neanderthals. Not only did they have make-up but they produced containers in which to store it, compacts if you will. These toiletries were manufactured from drilled sea shells which were found up to 60km inland, indicating both trade and organised migration where objects considered valuable would be retained and used or exchanged. It was known that shell had been used for adornment since prehistory but Zilhao’s  more recently discovered artefacts show that they were also used to keep pigments and coloured clays which were perfect for personal decoration.

So it seems that adorning the body in order to present a more attractive profile or impress our social status upon our peers through our outward appearance isn’t just a very old idea, it’s an idea that goes back to before we even existed as humans. The first humans existed in Europe from 40,000 years ago while neanderthals existed in Europe from 50,000 years ago and although they co-existed it had previously been believed they kept to their own regions and the only contact they had with one another was confrontational. However there is evidence now that the two societies not only shared culture and goods but may have even occasionally interbred. A child’s remains, found in Lagar Velho, Portugal which have been dated to 24,500 years ago show evidence of mixed Neanderthal-human parentage which, while certainly proving genetic exchange, would also lend strength to the theory that cultural  exchange took place between the earliest European inhabitants.

Because Neanderthal fossilized remains were the first European to be found,  they were presumed to be closer to our primate ancestors , that is they were thought to be nearer primates and the missing link. However, since evidence now shows that neanderthals and Cro Magnons, that is modern humans, exchanged culture, goods and it seems,  affection then the differences between them and us were in fact very slight. Things like made objects and cosmetics had been thought to be only within the realm of the human, neanderthals were assumed to be ‘cavemen’; troglodytes who merely grunted at one-another and threw sticks and rocks at passing animals yet what little evidence there is for this attitude is rapidly diminishing as we learn more about them. We see they had cosmetics which denote culture and they made cases to put them in which indicates they were capable of forward planning and sensed that a product had value and should be kept, developing a method and products by which to do so.

Neolithic ‘cave’ man not only seems never to have actually lived in any caves but he now proves to have had culture, religion and medicine, as evidence in herbal preparations found with bodily remains and successful  surgery including trepanning, surgery  to release pressure on the brain to relieve epilepsy, and release evil spirits by boring a hole in the skull. Considering these advances in science and religion it seems strange that we should believe these proto-humans as amoral savages who could only say ‘Ug’. Developing religion, decorating themselves and their surroundings with magical symbols, often with outstanding accuracy as found in preserved cave paintings and caring for the sick while only communicating with one another through rudimentary grunts and gestures seems barely possible. Indeed, the trachea and larynx couldn’t have evolved to an advanced state only for its practical application to be  later realised by man who then used their control of the  voice-box  to develop complex language. It seems fare more likely that the larynx would have needed to develop as greater requirements were made of it, as language and the needs of the speaker developed the structure of the throat would have needed to keep pace with it.

So it seems that while couture models are sometimes and unkindly regarded as being little more than clothes horses, parading up and down wearing too much make-up and clad in clothes that only exist to display the social status of the wearer they are, in reality, engaging in activity which is older than man himself, activity which can be seen to have been concomitant with advances in science, language, art and culture, advances by which we define ourselves as human.